Category Archive: Understand Negative Self-talk

How Can You “Lean In” if You Have the Negative Self-Talk Habit?

The early pages of Lean In by Sheryl Sandberg contain many examples of NST — Sandberg’s or other women’s thinking habit. She doesn’t label it negative self-talk, but notes the frequent presence of the imposter syndrome and self-criticism in many women.  Examples from her book: ” Show me a woman without guilt …

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Start Eliminating Negative Self-Talk — The Three A’s

I’m working on finishing my book: Handbook #1 for Intelligent Women: Break the Negative Self-Talk Habit with New Brain Science. As I started working on the chapter on the problem-solving process as the first step toward No NST, I read the end of the previous chapter, which I’ve copied below. It’s a …

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Mutual Regard in Critiquing — by Kelly Caldwell

Superb article about criticism which applies to critics of all kinds, professional and personal, critics of books and movies, or of people and behavior. I’m taking it seriously as I move into different aspects of critiquing. You will not be surprised that I also see that the factors identified — passion, frankness, and specificity, mutual …

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Go for Self-Acceptance/Let Go of Negative Self-Talk

“Too many of the women I see in private practice are immobilized by this idea of “should.” And it’s not just the haunting, tenacious feeling that you should do something, but the feeling that you should be something, namely an idealized version of yourself – the kind of person who would clean …

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Advice from Opera Star Joyce Di Donato about Negative Self-Talk

Still struggling with negative self-talk? Please listen to minutes 8 to 16 on Joyce Di Donato, Juilliard’s Master Class (YouTube).  Wilma Koutstaal, author of The Agile Mind, sent the link to me, knowing my writing and thinking about negative self-talk. The entire segment is interesting if you’re a music aficionado, …

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David Brooks Takes on Women’s Negative Self-Talk and Lack of Confidence

As regular readers know, I’m a regular fan of David Brooks. This column of his tied well into my intense interest in negative self-talk and I e-mailed him and attempted to answer some of his questions. I’ll let you know if and when and what I hear back — if anything! I’d …

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If You’re Into Negative Self Talk, Leaning In and Power Posing Won’t Work

Have you been following the hype, hoopla, and humor about Leaning In and Leaning Out? Leaning In is Sheryl Sandberg’s new book with advice for women who want to be leaders;  get more pushy, assertive , lean in, rather than back off. Leaning out is a funny comment by a male columnist …

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Realistic Thinking — The Gold Standard

WHAT IS REALISTIC THINKING? “I talk to myself inside all the time. That’s how I know what I’m thinking. That’s how I know how I’m feeling,” commented a friend during a recent discussion. He’s right. Our conscious mind has a voice. We can talk to ourselves negatively, positively or realistically. Most of …

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Podcast about the Negatives about Positive Thinking

Some people think positive thinking is the only way to go. Others think it’s a pile of make-believe.Here’s a podcast of an interview with Bo Bennett for Toastmasters International. I had written an article for the January issue of the magazine about debunking positive thinking. The interviewer, Bo, had some ideas that …

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Humility? An Asset for Leadership? What?

See the quote below from a good article about leadership from the University of Washington Foster School of Business. Topic? Humility leads to high performance and better leadership. The conclusion of the research is so divergent from the positive thinking hype, from the aggressive-cocky-is-better leadership stereotype (which …

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